Those who wait.......

I wanted to write today about a man that my husband and I are really worried about. We used to live in this area (Beverly Hills) about 5 years ago. We worked (actually in Belair, which is right next to Beverly Hills) for an older couple as their cook and housekeeper at that time. Sometimes we would go to the Hollywood Video to get a movie and we would pass by a man in the street near the store who was homeless. He was an African man, tall and very thin. His hair was matted, his clothes were soiled and torn. His expression was one of deep loneliness and sadness. You do not see that many homeless people in this area of California. But this man, definitely was homeless. Sometimes you see homeless people who have shopping carts filled with all the belongings they have in the world, their determined and soul-searching faces looking straight ahead......to avoid the stares from people passing by. But this man had absolutely nothing. We don't rent movies that often (mostly because it is such a horrible experience trying to find something decent to watch......having to see so many awful video covers!!!), but whenever we did go to the video store, we would pass by this same man on the same street, still homeless, still with nothing. We finally decided to try to give him some food. We bought some things at the store that we thought he would need and drove up to the street where we always saw him. There he was, looking through one of the dumpsters, his back turned toward the street. We stopped, rolled down the window and held out the bag of food, telling him it was for him, some food to help him. He didn't even turn around but shook his head back and forth, telling us "No". He didn't want our help.......as much as he needed help, he wouldn't take the food we had to give. So we drove away. Later, we said to each other that we should have just said....."that's ok" and just left the food there for him. But I think we were too afraid. His rejection of our food made us feel like we had done something wrong. We shouldn't have given up so easily. We saw this same poor homeless man many times after that during the time that we worked in Belair. He was alway on the same street; as time went on, he looked worse and worse. We felt so badly when we saw him. It just broke our hearts to see someone so destitute and alone and helpless. It just didn't seem right that in an area with so much of everything, there was this one single man whose life was so low and miserable. We wanted to help him so much. Then, we moved away; we moved back to Washington state and lived there for quite a while. We took care of my husband's mother for over a year. It was very special to be with her for that long of a time and Mike really cherishes that time we spent with her. After Mike's mother passed away, we decided to move back to California again to get back into domestic work. It was truely unbelieveable and sad was that once again we went to Hollywood Video to get a movie, when we first moved back here.......and there was the same homeless man we had seen from 5 years ago!!!! We just couldn't believe it!!!We were absolutely sure it was him. Only he was so much thinner and his clothes were even more threadbare and torn and soiled. And this time, he had no shoes. There he stood, in the dark, barefoot on the terrible, cold pavement. His expression was something I cannot even describe. I have never been starving or alone like that. My clothes have never been so soiled that they end up tearing and disintegrating. I have never felt that kind of desperation or fear. I just cannot imagine what he feels. Mike and I were so shocked that he was still there, in the very same place. We just felt that it was such a terrible, terrible tragedy that this poor man's life had not gotten better, but indeed had become terribly worse. We decided to try again to give him some food. We went to the store again and got him some food, drove by, tried to hand it out the window to him and he shook his head no. We said over and over again, "it's ok, it's for you; it's food". But he wouldn't take it. Last night, we saw him again. But this time, he looked noticeably weaker. His expression was one of just hopelessness and resignation. Mike and I decided that we need to just call one of the hospitals or the health department to help him. It just isn't right that he stands there, day after day, night after night, his life just fading away, while thousands of people all around him go out to dinner with their friends, laugh, smile, drive away in the comfort of their cars, go home to warm and happy homes.......not to make anyone feel guilty, but how can we live our lives so happily when there are people suffering???? Mother Theresa forsake herself so much to help those who noone would even look at. Even if we can do one tenth of what Mother Theresa did, we will be lifting humanity up a little higher, we will be alleviating the suffering of someone and bringing light into the hearts of another human being. I just cannot let another day go by and let that poor man stand in that dark and cold and lonely street by himself, thinking he is absolutely nothing to this world. I feel terrible that we haven't done more. We let ourselves think that we couldn't help him, when I am sure we can do something more.......something......anything, other than let that man fade away forever. We are going to call the health department or one of the hospitals and see if they can help him. If they could somehow get him to the hospital and feed him and help him feel clean and wholesome again......give him some medicine as I am sure he is probably very sick.......we would help pay for it, if that's necessary. I don't want to just leave everything up to them, though. I want to make sure they really help him and not just think he is a lost cause. We'll go up to the hospital and make sure they are taking care of him. If they can't do that, we'll find someone who will help us help him. If anyone knows of an agency or organization that we could contact about this homeless man, please let us know. We'll see what we can find on our own, but if anyone has any suggestions, we would be so grateful for your help. I think of people like that when they were children......that man was a little child once. He had happiness and energy and hope and joy in his heart, I am sure, as all children do when they are little. I am sure he had so much promise and potential, just like everyone does at the beginning of their lives. What happened to him? What terrible experiences did he have that brought his life to where it is now? What will happen to him? His life means something. He is someone. He is not invisible, nothing; he is alive and a human being. I really feel that we need to help people like that, if we can. If we can give to others, we should, in whatever way we can. I pray that somehow we can rise above the fears and feelings we have about homeless people and realize that they are in the situations they are in because noone is helping them!!! There wouldn't be homeless people if we did more to alleviate this terrible suffering in the world.